Posts Tagged Bendever Gerona
Adeu (To God…Goodbye)
Posted by Bendz in Ramblings & Rants on October 9, 2009
“Adeu, Adeu, Adeu, Adeu!” ~Sound of Music
Several chapters has been opened and close.
One chapter left hanging…
In the hopes to make it thicker.
Waiting for a long time but not really longing
Waiting for the tide to move the wind
and the wind to move things to the right places
no more passion, no more sorrow
only pain and some questions..
what could have been the season?
is there another reason?
could the the butterfly and the bird be
when the rain had stopped the river from flowing?
time passed and now it happened
no one could stop my heart from beating…
no one can stop their worlds from turning…
as people move on in this world of oblivion
one chooses to stay to put the final dot
on the chapter that’s hanging.
The Fates had spoken
The traveler must move on
through madness and reason
and into a life unknown
Home is Facebook
Posted by Bendz in Ramblings & Rants on September 30, 2009
It’s been almost a month since I got my own broadband connection at my apartment and until now I’m still in the middle of “unpacking the boxes”—boxed files, that is. My whole digital life is packed in one DVD and 5 CD optical drives containing old docs, photos, MP3, vids, blog templates and an unfinished Tantra Online Overlay for Friendster. Some files are hosted by online free storage spaces like Photobucket and Picasa as well.
I’ve lived without Internet connection for a year and eight months which felt like and eternity for someone who has been wired to cyberspace for three years. Of course I’ve had access to the web through the office and the Internet cafes but nothing can ever compare to having it in the privacy of your own home and without other people yelling “DAGAN!!!” as the try to rescue their DOTA characters from imminent death.
The Internet has now become something personal, something that you should have for your own and not to be a shared experience with other cafe users. I don’t know when it started, perhaps during the time when I don’t have on-demand access. Kinda reminds me of the time mom and takes me with her to a PLDT office and wait on queue as everyone takes turns to call their loved ones abroad. Now, phones are everywhere.
So, what have I missed since the last time I got Internet connection? Well, I lost track of my friends on Tantra Online, an online game that kept me up all night long before, I failed to write regularly on my blog, and I lost a lot of my online friends. But, thanks to the wonders of Facebook, I got a lot of them back. Not all yet but it’s getting there, hopefully.
It’s really amazing how logging in to a website makes you feel at home, with the people who shared a piece of your life story and still be able to continue sharing it with them. For instance, I got reunited with my grade one teacher who now is working in another country; I reconnected with Katrina Santiago and Mena Reyes who are both happily married; and mothers now with foreign last names; and, I now have tabs on my classmates who have chosen the nursing profession who’s going to, already in, planning to go to, and can’t go to the US.
Sadly, I don’t feel “at home” as much as I do when I’m on Facebook when I’m in Maasin cause it seems like all the people I know have gone somewhere else. Can’t blame them, I too left in search for new beginnings and a better job. It’s what you do when their is no other option, specially if you don’t know people. Can’t really blame anyone for life’s harsh realities. You just got to do what must be done even if it means moving away from the people and the place you’ve grown accustomed to and loved.
It’s almost Christmas and, although this will sound incoherent to the topic, I guess I could, as early as now, make a wish. I wish that people who gets to read this and knows me would add me to their Facebook friends list (facebook.com/bendzgerona). I promise to send you anything you want…through Facebook gifts. ^_~
Going Home for Maasin City Charter Day and Fiesta 2009
Posted by Bendz in Ramblings & Rants on July 29, 2009
Last year, I was not able to go home to Maasin to celebrate it’s charter day and fiesta thanks to a hectic schedule and some major life transitions. They said there’s always gonna be a first time for everything and that one was my first. I failed to get my token of recognition for 5 years of service to the Maasin City government as well as the SK Federation which is, well, ranks the top of my list. It’s a sad sad moment and as much as I regret making the choice, the universe would not share my sorrow and create a vortex for me to relive the past.
As the period of transition is over and my life’s anchor is properly placed (for now), I’d be stupid to miss the chance to be home and meet the people I care the most and who never fails to include me in their thoughts from time to time. Thus, I arranged by schedule for maximum participation to Maasin City’s Charter Day and Fiesta 2009 events.
Rachel, told me yesterday, via Facebook that their department is taking charge of the Opening Ceremony and honoring of Alfredo K. Bantug’s 100th birthday. He’s one of the Maasin City’s most admired mayor and who also fathered a lot of children from those admirers.
Ma’am Effie, Maasin City vice mayor, invited me to watch the Miss Maasin City Pageant 2009 which will be on the eighth which upped my desire to be home until Geoffry posted the pictures on his blog making me reconsider. I wonder where have all the pretty girls of Maasin gone and why they haven’t been picked? Have they gone blind or had they acquired a more “native” taste? Since they are pushing through with the event, I think the only way they can drive people to watch it is to make all tickets complementary or sell them at half the usual price.
I’ll rest my case on Miss Maasin City or I’ll be damned when I go home. Oh well, who am I kidding? No one from Maasin reads this blog.
Anyway, I hope I meet my old friends when I go home. Perhaps Yhan-yhan will be home as well and sir Jingle will not be to busy so I can treat him to coffee. I really miss all of you guys.
See you in Maasin!
Doubt is a Bond…
Posted by Bendz in Ramblings & Rants on June 6, 2009
Forgive me for changing my mind once again. I’m legally fickle, if such a status exists. On my previous post, I talked about going home to continue my studies and I too am pretty convinced at that time that it’s gonna be a decision with a hundred percent certainty although it’s something not clearly planned.
Today I had one of the best days of my life. With some friends, an impromptu trip to one of Maasin City’s famous beaches was conjured up as I wait for the clock to tick 10 PM—for my scheduled trip back to the Queen City of the South. It turns out as something more than a beach trip though and it’s all thanks to the monsoons (I cannot, however, tell you which type).
The waves were not as big as those in Siargao but it’s enough to send a 330-pounder tumbling to the shores if one is not careful and strong enough to withstand it’s force, which makes it more fun and exciting (like Lady Gaga’s idea of making love). This has been the most straining activity I’ve done in about a year and it’s aftermath can now be felt with every movement of my body. With doubt as to the next step to take, still clouding my mind, today’s fun escapade ended up with me climbing the steps of the only ship bound from Maasin to Cebu, M/V Filipinas Ilo-ilo (a vessel I once boarded after a weeks trip to Boracay about three years ago).
A Facebook buddy once said that doubt is a gift, cause it puts us between two certainties and perhaps that’s how i should look at it. I’m drafting this blog post on board the ship but that does not mean that I already decided to stay where I am now—in Cebu, basking in the agony of adult life and striving to survive the next day just like people who leave the comforts of their hometown in search for a pasteur, greener or otherwise. What it means still has to be deciphered based on the events which will happen in the next three days or so.
As I told Cherry Dy, a friend of mine, I don’t really have any life plans, and if I do, it will be something written in a pencil to make editing a breeze. All major decisions, starting from my bid for the SK Federations presidency, had ways been made on the spur of the moment based on how I decipher the signs. I have some regrets along the way but it’s nothing major. Besides those bumps, I could say that I’ve been generally happy. Or perhaps, I just tried to be. (See how fickle I am?)
For someone who does not practice his faith on the divine as much as any church going Tom, Dick and Harry, I believe that somehow, the Fates would lead me to the right path to take just like a prophet being led by god.
Now that, is blasphemy.
Quitting Convergys and Going Back to School
Posted by Bendz in Ramblings & Rants on June 3, 2009
With courage in tow, I decided to head home and start my life’s new chapter. It would most likely be a chapter mostly consisting of flashbacks as it is a continuation of an unfinished one. Uncertainty may not be an emotions but it’s what fills up my core right now. It’s scary cause it would entail facing the ghosts that once haunted and drove me to move to a new city. It’s also a good thing, perhaps, cause with uncertainty comes the hope of having something better.Don’t get me wrong, working for the Convergys, the best call center in Cebu, is one of the best things that happened to me. My year’s experience there is something I will always be proud. I’ve learned a lot of things that I could not possibly learn from school or government service and most of all I was blessed to have gotten a supervisor that has been very supportive and believed in my capabilities even if I didn’t and from that trust, I’m proud to say that my performance has been exemplary ever since the day I took my first call, which is a kudos call by the way. You may wonder why I’m leaving even with such a great working environment. Well, the answer is simple—it’s time.I feel like the shepherd, in Coelho’s The Alchemist, when he was working in the glass blower’s shop faced with the choice of staying or listening to the voice of the universe and pursuing his personal legend. It seems like the voice of the universe has been haunting me in both my thoughts and dreams again and this time it’s more persistent. I could stay but as the story goes, it’s better to follow the voice than choose the easier path.The urim and thummim has spoken and so, as the shepherd’s story goes, off to Egypt I go.
